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How to squash a flu fast.

Inclag

Turbo Monkey
Sep 9, 2001
2,341
61
MA
I have some sort of flu that started up yesterday and need to at least be functional by this evening. I've taken some immune system boosters and just popped a couple extra strength sudafeds which usually does the trick with clearing me up, however it makes me a little trippy after taking it so those two pills will be it for the day. Anyone else have any quick working remedies from when you are in a bind?
 

binary visions

The voice of reason
Jun 13, 2002
21,663
411
NC
Drink heavily. Preferably something with very high alcohol content, like Everclear. It'll help kill all the bugs in your system.
 

Inclag

Turbo Monkey
Sep 9, 2001
2,341
61
MA
Drink heavily. Preferably something with very high alcohol content, like Everclear. It'll help kill all the bugs in your system.
:bonk: Although I like this type of thinking, and that very opportunity could present itself, I think I will pass.
 

ultraNoob

Yoshinoya Destroyer
Jan 20, 2007
4,515
1
Hills of Paradise
In this order.... guaifenesin syrup (aka, expectorant) generic pseudophedrine (the good stuff from behind the counter... not that off the shelf stuff) pediatric electrolyte, hot steamy shower, sleep. Should feel good enough for tonight.
 

r464

Turbo Monkey
Oct 17, 2006
2,608
0
Earth
In this order.... guaifenesin syrup (aka, expectorant) generic pseudophedrine (the good stuff from behind the counter... not that off the shelf stuff) pediatric electrolyte, hot steamy shower, sleep. Should feel good enough for tonight.
Where is the enema in that ordered list?
 

in the trees

Turbo Monkey
May 19, 2003
1,210
1
NH
I never get sick and I'm coming off a week long battle with the flu. Fever, chills, congestion, and a nasty cough. I hope you don't have what I have. It sucks!

Get well!

toby
 

gsweet

Monkey
Dec 20, 2001
734
5
Minnesota
it may sound odd, but this actually does generally work:
1. buy 5+ lbs of fresh lemons
2. make 1 gallon of fresh lemonade (little to no sugar or water added)
3. drink it all within 1 hour

the massive influx of highly acidic liquid will effectively throw off your body's pH for a while, thus killing anything you have (and many other things as well). my buddy came up with this in college (he was a pre-med bio major) and swears by it when he thinks he's coming down with something. i've never tried it, but he says that aside from feeling kinda weird for a few hours, it's solid.
 

Inclag

Turbo Monkey
Sep 9, 2001
2,341
61
MA
I never get sick and I'm coming off a week long battle with the flu. Fever, chills, congestion, and a nasty cough. I hope you don't have what I have. It sucks!

Get well!

toby
Well I had heard that there was a strong flu virus in NE, maybe you got that? I hope I don't have it.

I bet it was from going to the doctors on Tuesday to get some stitches removed. Those places are cesspools.
 

Inclag

Turbo Monkey
Sep 9, 2001
2,341
61
MA
it may sound odd, but this actually does generally work:
1. buy 5+ lbs of fresh lemons
2. make 1 gallon of fresh lemonade (little to no sugar or water added)
3. drink it all within 1 hour

the massive influx of highly acidic liquid will effectively throw off your body's pH for a while, thus killing anything you have (and many other things as well). my buddy came up with this in college (he was a pre-med bio major) and swears by it when he thinks he's coming down with something. i've never tried it, but he says that aside from feeling kinda weird for a few hours, it's solid.
Well I don't have time to sleep so this sounds interesting, however I don't want to be a guinea pig.

You know that I probably would have been dense enough to do this if you had lied and said that it works :busted:
 

SK6

Turbo Monkey
Jul 10, 2001
7,596
0
Shut up and ride...
it may sound odd, but this actually does generally work:
1. buy 5+ lbs of fresh lemons
2. make 1 gallon of fresh lemonade (little to no sugar or water added)
3. drink it all within 1 hour

the massive influx of highly acidic liquid will effectively throw off your body's pH for a while, thus killing anything you have (and many other things as well). my buddy came up with this in college (he was a pre-med bio major) and swears by it when he thinks he's coming down with something. i've never tried it, but he says that aside from feeling kinda weird for a few hours, it's solid.
Add some Everclear, and the "feeling kinda weird for a few hours" becomes a none issue. :thumb:
 

Prettym1k3

Turbo Monkey
Aug 21, 2006
2,867
0
In your pants
I go with this mix:

Eat VERY healthy. Nothing but soup, and light carbs.
Drink lots of water (3-4 bottles a day).
Jamba Juice (With Immunity Boost)
2 bottles of Vitamin Water every day.
Vitamin C tablets (300-500% per day)
Watch Breakfast Club. That's my sick movie of choice.
Pee a lot.

I know it sounds weird, but it works. 2-3 days, and I'm right-as-rain.
 

gsweet

Monkey
Dec 20, 2001
734
5
Minnesota
not trying to guinea pig you here. my friend swears by it and it apparently works for him. i just haven't gotten sick enough in the last 4 years to try it. good luck though...the backup plan is always booze (and you could squeeze a few lemons in there for good measure). also, if you happen to catch the virus ahead of time, you could try something called zycam (pill form, liquid form, etc) that you pick up at your local drugstore.
 

BMXman

I wish I was Canadian
Sep 8, 2001
13,854
0
Victoria, BC
it may sound odd, but this actually does generally work:
1. buy 5+ lbs of fresh lemons
2. make 1 gallon of fresh lemonade (little to no sugar or water added)
3. drink it all within 1 hour

the massive influx of highly acidic liquid will effectively throw off your body's pH for a while, thus killing anything you have (and many other things as well). my buddy came up with this in college (he was a pre-med bio major) and swears by it when he thinks he's coming down with something. i've never tried it, but he says that aside from feeling kinda weird for a few hours, it's solid.

Last I read the body can only absorb 8-10oz of water an hour....so would this really work?....D
 

Westy

the teste
Nov 22, 2002
36,622
3,441
Sleazattle
Last I read the body can only absorb 8-10oz of water an hour....so would this really work?....D

24-36oz if you need fluids. I can confirm this with real experience when riding the bike and drinking beer over long periods of time.
 

amateur

Turbo Monkey
Apr 18, 2002
1,019
0
Orange County
it may sound odd, but this actually does generally work:
1. buy 5+ lbs of fresh lemons
2. make 1 gallon of fresh lemonade (little to no sugar or water added)
3. drink it all within 1 hour

the massive influx of highly acidic liquid will effectively throw off your body's pH for a while, thus killing anything you have (and many other things as well). my buddy came up with this in college (he was a pre-med bio major) and swears by it when he thinks he's coming down with something. i've never tried it, but he says that aside from feeling kinda weird for a few hours, it's solid.
Do this, or just breathe less/into a paper bag. The CO2 will put you into respiratory acidosis, which should, if he is right, make you better near instantly as this method can drop your blood pH down to 7.2ish, which is way lower than you could attain by eating/drinking anything.
 

JohnE

filthy rascist
May 13, 2005
12,647
664
Front Range, dude...
I go with this mix:

Eat VERY healthy. Nothing but soup, and light carbs.
Drink lots of water (3-4 bottles a day).
Jamba Juice (With Immunity Boost)
2 bottles of Vitamin Water every day.
Vitamin C tablets (300-500% per day)
Watch Breakfast Club. That's my sick movie of choice.
Pee a lot.

I know it sounds weird, but it works. 2-3 days, and I'm right-as-rain.
Watching Breakfast Club would put me into a HS flashback coma...Ally Sheedy and Molly Ringwald :busted::cupidarrow::drool:

And 2-3 days? That would get me over the bug anyway...I dont normally get sick for more than a day, day and a half. More then that and the wife suggests hospitalization.