[rockofullr]

Well, where do you hide yours? Asking for a friend.

I just have one. It's big and black and I keep it in my bum.

 

[rockofullr]

Lets all just appreciate the pure Florida going on in this mug shot.

West Palm Beach, Florida —

A Florida woman is facing charges after police say she was driving drunk with a child unrestrained in the backseat.

http://www.kcra.com/article/mom-accused-of-driving-drunk-with-unrestrained-3-year-old-in-backseat/12029543

 

[JohnE]

Because screw 'em if their parents dont care enough about them to have enough money to take care of them...

http://www.cnn.com/2017/08/18/health/florida-sick-kids-insurance-eprise/index.html

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

Pro-level Floridians, apparently.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/breaking-news/os-car-explosion-grill-cigarette-20170813-story.html

See this is why you grill with charcoal.


One Fourth of July I saw a hatchback rolling down the street with a charcoal grill in the back, lit, with smoke trailing behind.

 

[JohnE]

Well, its near Florida...

https://www.yahoo.com/beauty/mom-arrested-12-year-olds-tattoo-211415890.html

 

[6thElement]

Many places to post this, but the Florida thread won out.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/41201494/people-like-ryon-are-going-to-shoot-at-hurricane-irma

 

[Mo(n)arch]

Many places to post this, but the Florida thread won out.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/41201494/people-like-ryon-are-going-to-shoot-at-hurricane-irma

I am speechless. So much dumb...

 

[Adventurous]

Cuz why not.

 

[Westy]

Cuz why not.

Glass bottles by the pool?

How gauche!

 

[scrider]

Glass bottles by the pool?

How gauche!

No Cleansing of the gene pool, very disappointing.....

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_59ba5567e4b02da0e13f6b41

 

[Pesqueeb]

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_59ba5567e4b02da0e13f6b41

Florida size crack pipe?

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

Florida size crack pipe?

Most likely meth, or bath salts.

 

[rockofullr]

Not sure if this link will work, but....

I'm really enjoying this ESL translator's exuberance.

EDIT: The link to the video isn't working so just watch the video at the top of this article.

http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/349968-florida-sheriff-warns-citizens-dont-shoot-at-hurricane-irma

 

[jonKranked]

somehow not florida:

http://worldnewsdailyreport.com/fbi-seizes-over-3000-penises-during-raid-at-morgue-employees-home/

 

[kidwoo]

^scared to click

 

[jonKranked]

^scared to click

it's sfw. but hella creepy.

 

[Nick]

Ok that's fucked up...

 

[johnbryanpeters]

What a dick.

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

When giving someone a dick in a box just ain't gettin it...

 

[Pesqueeb]

Is it "organ trafficking" if he's keeping them all for himself?

 

[Westy]

They get trafficked by the bag up in these parts.

 

[rockofullr]

somehow not florida:

http://worldnewsdailyreport.com/fbi-seizes-over-3000-penises-during-raid-at-morgue-employees-home/

Don't wanna rain on your embalmed dick parade but I'm gonna guess this is fake. Just a hunch I'm getting, based on the other stories on the website such as:

Florida: 400-Pound Woman Survives Sexual Assault by herd of Manatees

 

[jonKranked]

Don't wanna rain on your embalmed dick parade but I'm gonna guess this is fake. Just a hunch I'm getting, based on the other stories on the website such as:

what, "world news daily report" didn't tip you off?

 

[rockofullr]

what, "world news daily report" didn't tip you off?

Sooooo.....

You knew it was fake and not even in Floridia and yet you posted it here

No respect

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

Sooooo.....

You knew it was fake and not even in Floridia and yet you posted it here

No respect, Sean Spicer, non at all.

fx'd

 

[jonKranked]

Sooooo.....

You knew it was fake and not even in Floridia and yet you posted it here

No respect

meh don't care. go case a backflip.

 

[Westy]

jonKranked=fake news

 

[eric strt6]

you have to be shitting me

A Florida woman is facing a murder charge after, authorities say, she punished her 9-year-old cousin by sitting on her, causing the child to go into cardiac arrest.

Veronica Posey, 64, told investigators that her niece, Dericka Lindsay, had been misbehaving, so she decided to sit on top of the child as punishment. Minutes later, Dericka said she couldn't breathe. She was unconscious by the time Posey stood up, according to an arrest report from the Escambia County Sheriff's Office.

Dericka, who was just a little over 3 feet tall, weighed 74 pounds, the report says. Posey weighs 320 pounds - more than four times the child's weight.
http://www.sfgate.com/news/article/A-320-pound-woman-sat-on-a-little-girl-as-a-12285376.php

 

[Pesqueeb]

you have to be sitting me

A Florida woman is facing a murder charge after, authorities say, she punished her 9-year-old cousin by sitting on her, causing the child to go into cardiac arrest.

Veronica Posey, 64, told investigators that her niece, Dericka Lindsay, had been misbehaving, so she decided to sit on top of the child as punishment. Minutes later, Dericka said she couldn't breathe. She was unconscious by the time Posey stood up, according to an arrest report from the Escambia County Sheriff's Office.

Dericka, who was just a little over 3 feet tall, weighed 74 pounds, the report says. Posey weighs 320 pounds - more than four times the child's weight.
http://www.sfgate.com/news/article/A-320-pound-woman-sat-on-a-little-girl-as-a-12285376.php

FTFY

 

[jimmydean]

Even Florida doesn't like the Nazi's

Richard Spencer’s event at the university in Gainesville, which prompted the governor to declare a state of emergency to prepare for possible violence, comes about two months after rallies by neo-Nazis and white supremacists in Charlottesville, Virginia, led to a deadly clash with counter-protesters.

 

[JohnE]

FTFY

Took me a minute, but I see what you did there...

 

[rideit]

The promised land?
http://www.ajc.com/news/weird-news/police-investigate-after-pounds-marijuana-arrives-with-florida-couple-amazon-order/6m6PuE57dlzUfFbHYD8nSO/

 

[AngryMetalsmith]

The promised land?
http://www.ajc.com/news/weird-news/police-investigate-after-pounds-marijuana-arrives-with-florida-couple-amazon-order/6m6PuE57dlzUfFbHYD8nSO/

Must have been Mexican brick weed, I would have sent it back too.

 

[jackalope]

Have to admit , I admire the chutzpah-

https://www.yahoo.com/news/woman-accused-swapping-barcodes-walmart-212521914.html

 

[Westy]

I think they made a mistake, this is clearly florida

http://komonews.com/news/offbeat/ohio-teen-caught-having-sex-with-wiener-dog-again

 

[JohnE]

An Anthony Weiner dog?

Thats what the dog gets for being so suggestively named...

 

[JohnE]

Have to admit , I admire the chutzpah-

https://www.yahoo.com/news/woman-accused-swapping-barcodes-walmart-212521914.html

Busted for shoplifting while carrying a Coach purse...nice.

 

[mykel]

Busted for shoplifting while carrying a Coach purse...nice.

How do you think she got the coach purse?

 

[jimmydean]

This week in Florida:
3-foot sword found near victim killed in 'violent attack,' homeless man arrested

Authorities received a 911 Saturday afternoon call about someone covered in blood lying next to railroad tracks in Lake Worth, about 10 miles south of West Palm Beach, the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office said

Responding authorities found a man dead from "visible injuries consistent with a violent attack," the sheriff's office said. A 3-foot sword was also found near the victim, the sheriff's office said.