the random thought thread
- Thread starter skinny mike
- Start date
It gets on them from Cheetos and Doritos. It mixes with sweat and becomes like a toxic glaze.
Ha, she was in the shower...... I was getting ready for work...So you have a woman who spent the night who is still there but you're posting on teh monkey instead of "spending more time" with her? You may have a few screws loose dude
Who said anything about sex??? You just assumed I was bragging about sex. This girl is more than just that.
Food crumbs get trapped in the fat folds and begin to decay. They don't always get washed out in the shower. Just something to think about next time you're standing in line at the store behind a fatty.
(Disclaimer: Unrelated to any other random Monkey thought...)
What. The. Fvck.
What. The. Fvck.
its quite a paradox; cheese is awesome. fat people, not so much...
My buddies wife lost 90lbs. I tried to get close to her to see if she smelled like cheese. Nope cigarettes.
She does laundry too?
Sammichs?
If home depot had groceries, men would always volunteer to go.
7 shots of tequila cannot be tasted when mixed with 1 pint of of Langer's brand pineapple coconut juice.
She even "Mows the grass"....
Shhhhhhh Keep that on the down low, know one is supposed to know I have a sweet sideawww, that's so sweet
Speaking of sweet men... my husband is awesome.
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Not a thought as much as a conversation...
Me: Can I get you to help me move a few things?
Friend: What do I look like a moving company.
Me: Are effin serious?
Friend: yup then some mouth breathing noises.
Me: I have moved your sh!t 5 times in the last 10 years, and possibly more in the last 20.
Friend: You could have said no... More mouth breathing noises....
Fast forward 2 weeks....
Friend: I can't go riding until you help me put back together my 40 and bleed my Formula Brakes.
Me: ORLY....
Me: Can I get you to help me move a few things?
Friend: What do I look like a moving company.
Me: Are effin serious?
Friend: yup then some mouth breathing noises.
Me: I have moved your sh!t 5 times in the last 10 years, and possibly more in the last 20.
Friend: You could have said no... More mouth breathing noises....
Fast forward 2 weeks....
Friend: I can't go riding until you help me put back together my 40 and bleed my Formula Brakes.
Me: ORLY....
Upper decker.
I am afraid you have confused me with another degenerate. I have an aversion to poo. Mine and everyone else's.
poo handle?
Why do some people insist on speaking on the phone when a simple 1 sentence email gives all the information needed? I fvcking hate talking on the phone.
they probably take extreme pleasure in knowing that it annoys you to no end
Anyone want to come to my house and put together my new propane grill for me? I'm feeling really lazy and don't want to do it.
I can pay you with beer
I can pay you with beer
Problem is I won't answer. They can leave me voicemail after voicemail, as I reply to each one with an email. They usually get the hint pretty quick.
I haven't touched a drop of whiskey in 4 years. Opiates and Cocaine in 6 years. Today is my anniversary.
Happy Anniversary jd !!!!
May I buy you a pint of refreshing spring water to celebrate ?
Mango Koolaid. I got plenty so never mind.
Happy Anniversary! Nice work! Have some kool aid!
I hate crossing guards.
Hit the following keys on your keyboard at the same time...
Ctrl, Alt, and the down arrow key
Ctrl, Alt, and the down arrow key
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How do you tell a girl she's a bad kisser? The one I was just with is the worst I've ever been with. I don't think I'm calling her back so it's not really an issue. But for future reference?
Tell her that her shoes are ugly.
Good call.
You guys hear that???
Even Myself just stepped up and called me an asshole.....
Even Myself just stepped up and called me an asshole.....
Woke up 4 times last night, each time I had a boner. Does that mean I had a boner all night?
I don't want to know sherms . I was riding xc today and as I was doing a climbing I started thinking which rocky movie is the best ? The 3rd rocky with mr t as clubber lane was great but Mickey dies in that one and that sucked . then I started how great the 4th rocky was with drago . When drago ko Apollo and said "if he dies he dies " I was thinking how f upped that was . Then how patriotic the 4th rocky was when rocky went to russia and took out there champ . Just something to think about .