It helped having a father who was into hunting.......I learned to crap in the woods and use dry crusty leaves for cleanup duty. I'm big pimpin' now as I take toilet paper with me everywhere.I envy you.
My friends and wife laugh at me now, especially when we stop for fast food and they see me grab about 80 napkins to keep in the truck in case of roadside emergency.
The only places i try to avoid are those nasty gas stations where the toilet is outside and you have to go in and get the cinder block with a key attached. 9 times out of 10 there is crap on the floor.
I have so many stories i could be on here all night. A funny one that comes to mind was an emergency stop at a Wendys. I'm in the stahl doing my business and one of the employees opens the door to the bathroom. I don't know why they sent a women in the mens room, but soon as she opened the door she said "oh dear lord, whoooo child thats musty". Even after a courtesy flush?? She then shut the door. I was patiently waiting for the second wave and she comes in again. Apparently she must have been told to clean up, and she was getting impatient, but still did not want to be in there with me in the stahl. This time she said "you still in here"? I said yes I am. She said "well for how long". I said I did not know this was a timed event and someone should have told me when the clock started so I could have gotten my terds lined up for quick and effecient dismissle. She didn't bother me anymore after that