Donald Trump’s Presidency 2017 - 2021 AND 2025-202X
Too bad it's from Borowitz.Satire from The Borowitz Report
Bloomberg Offers Trump Ten Billion Dollars to Leave White House by End of Day
By Andy Borowitz
November 8, 2019
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—The former New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg upended the 2020 Presidential race on Friday by offering Donald J. Trump ten billion dollars to leave the White House by the end of the day.
“I will deposit ten billion dollars into your account in Moscow, Riyadh, or wherever you do your banking these days,” Bloomberg announced. “All you have to do is go.”
In addition to the ten-billion-dollar offer, Bloomberg told Trump that he would cover the moving expenses of Ivanka Trump, Jared Kushner, Kellyanne Conway, and any other associates “that you haven’t already gotten rid of.”
On Capitol Hill, congressional Democrats expressed sadness that Bloomberg’s offer, if successful, would eliminate the need for impeachment, which many of them had been looking forward to.
But Representative Adam Schiff of California struck a more philosophical note. “If ten billion dollars gets rid of Donald Trump, that’s a quid pro quo I’m okay with,” he said.
But are there any Mexicans in Germany? I DONT THINK SO!
TAKE THAT LIBTARDS!
qz.com
TAKE THAT LIBTARDS!
Berliners are trolling Trump by shipping him a 2.7-ton piece of the Berlin Wall
Quartz is a guide to the new global economy for people in business who are excited by change. We cover business, economics, markets, finance, technology, science, design, and fashion.
qz.com
The final season episode just popped up on Hulu. Nicely done.
But building and monitoring the wall creates jobs, and it keeps job stealing foreign folks out. It’s a win-win BOGO twofer!But are there any Mexicans in Germany? I DONT THINK SO!
TAKE THAT LIBTARDS!
Berliners are trolling Trump by shipping him a 2.7-ton piece of the Berlin Wall
Quartz is a guide to the new global economy for people in business who are excited by change. We cover business, economics, markets, finance, technology, science, design, and fashion.
Interesting. State/Bolton internally overruled OMB/Mulvaney.
The mustache is not amused by this chicanery!
There was some soft headed mouth breather on NPR this morning whose name I didn't catch claiming that the whole Ukraine thing is a non-story because Ukraine got aid "eventually, anyway", therefore, nothing wrong and definitely not a quid-pro-quo.
Semi-related:
The Conspiracy Theories A Conservative Must Believe Today | Washington Monthly
As Donald Trump and his conservative defenders begin to construct a conspiracy theory that Adam Schiff personally orchestrated a massive conspiracy to entrap Trump in Ukraine, it’s worth noting just how many conspiracy theories you have to believe in just to be a standard Republican these days...
washingtonmonthly.com
Fake news.Semi-related:
The Conspiracy Theories A Conservative Must Believe Today | Washington Monthly
As Donald Trump and his conservative defenders begin to construct a conspiracy theory that Adam Schiff personally orchestrated a massive conspiracy to entrap Trump in Ukraine, it’s worth noting just how many conspiracy theories you have to believe in just to be a standard Republican these days...
Giuliani accidentally texted me his password. Then things got weird
Trump's cybersecurity adviser can't stop making cybersecurity blunders
www.salon.com
So much grift and so many frankly criminals in the Trump/Giuliani universe.
ThE bEsT bUsInEsS dEaLs
www.newsweek.com
Did Trump Launder Drug Money Through Panama?
Some say it is time for Congress to begin investigating the president's finances and potential conflicts of interest.
www.newsweek.com
That's probably just to cover his personal cocaine use.ThE bEsT bUsInEsS dEaLs
Did Trump Launder Drug Money Through Panama?
Some say it is time for Congress to begin investigating the president's finances and potential conflicts of interest.
that actually sounds familiar .... money laundering..... didn't trump's AC casino get shut down for not having federally required money laundering controls in place?
"What a shocking revelation!" - No one who was paying attention.
www.splcenter.org
Stephen Miller’s Affinity for White Nationalism Revealed in Leaked Emails
In the run-up to the 2016 election, White House senior policy adviser Stephen Miller promoted white nationalist literature, pushed racist immigration stories and obsessed over the loss of Confederate symbols after Dylann Roof’s murderous rampage, according to leaked emails reviewed by Hatewatch.
www.splcenter.org
Boy, that sure sounds awful collusion-ey.
www.politico.com
Stone previewed WikiLeaks bounty to Trump campaign in April 2016
The revelation means the Trump campaign — and Donald Trump himself — were aware of WikiLeaks' plans earlier than previously understood.
www.politico.com
Coming soon!
Bill Murray is Mick Mulvaney in:
The Man Who Knew Too Little.
Bill Murray is Mick Mulvaney in:
The Man Who Knew Too Little.
Senior Trump official embellished résumé, had face on fake Time cover
State Dept. official Mina Chang claimed to be a Harvard Business School "alumna" who ran a nonprofit that worked in 40 countries.
Grifters all the way down.
Senior Trump official embellished résumé, had face on fake Time cover
State Dept. official Mina Chang claimed to be a Harvard Business School "alumna" who ran a nonprofit that worked in 40 countries.www.nbcnews.com
Honestly, it's only a little surprising that Brian isn't head of something like Office of Infrastructure Protection. Guess he didn't donate enough to the inaugural.
dEmoCraTs DoNt CaRe aboUt naTioNaL SeCurIty!
www.businessinsider.com
The US Navy canceled a routine Black Sea patrol after Trump complained that it was hostile to Russia
Trump complained about a CNN report that framed the Black Sea operation as a counter to Russia, according to newly released testimony.
www.businessinsider.com
For the record: Fuck Devin Nunes. Goldbricking, carpet bagging, mother fucker. Keep pounding the table, asshole.
LULZ, eat shit Gym Jordan.
"No quid pro quo! But if you don't do specifically this, you won't get specifically that. Even though this and that are otherwise unrelated in any way." - Trump apologists, soon.
he's a good witness. it'll be interesting to see how the Rs try and diminish him and his testimony.
"Derp state angry democrat who voted for Hillary's uranium emails!"- Nunes, about 20 minutes from now.
"I want to spend a little time reading the transcript, as we have been encouraged to do."
Oh good, the guy who is suing a fake cow on twitter is about to start his 45 minutes of very serious® questioning!
Like I told @jonKranked earlier, Nunes is only there to placate one person.
Ratcliff with that grandstanding.
“Translated to the US”. 
Ben Stiller must play Steve Castor in the movie.
Ben Stiller must play Steve Castor in the movie.
Last edited:
Doh, not at work yet where I might be able to stream some of the shinanigans. Could get spicy this afternoon.
Oh good, the guy who helped cover up historic levels of sexual abuse gets to grill Taylor about right/wrong.
tOtAlLy InNoCeNt
Ratfucker is going to have a coronary. Dial it down son! Someone get that man a Valium.
Full pound the table defense!
Full pound the table defense!