[rideit]

in forward position I loose my asshole

 

[jonKranked]

my nut bucket

 

[Pesqueeb]

lowered the ball down one hole

 

[SkaredShtles]

Into the bush

 

[Atomic Dog]

I can slide them in.

 

[eric strt6]

I just humped a giant mattress-in-a-box

 

[Pesqueeb]

I will do a quickie

 

[Atomic Dog]

Not as girthy as @jonKranked

 

[Serial Midget]

Way better than humping a giant mattress.

 

[jdcamb]

If a Pizza is baked in a forest, and no one is around to eat it, is it still delicious?

 

[Westy]

If a Pizza is baked in a forest, and no one is around to eat it, is it still delicious?

The lack of an observer on a macro scale does not change causality.

In other words, delicious pizza is always delicious.

 

[jdcamb]

The lack of an observer on a macro scale does not change causality.

In other words, delicious pizza is always delicious.

Access to Pineapple and Ham is pretty much limited in the forest so I suppose you're right.

 

[jackalope]

rear support is higher, and they feel like ass pumping transitions. They also kind of feel weird

 

[stevew]

Access to Pineapple and Ham is pretty much limited in the forest so I suppose you're right.

pineapple....nope....never....

 

[Westy]

Access to Pineapple and Ham is pretty much limited in the forest so I suppose you're right.

I once emailed this to my local pizzeria

As part of my weekly pizza ritual I ordered a large pepperoni and mushroom pizza from your Phinney Ridge location. When I got home I was horrified to find that I had in fact received a pepperoni and pineapple pizza. Due to the complications of returning a pizza during a pandemic I decided to suck it up and quickly removed as much pineapple as I could. I would really like to get a pepperoni and mushroom pizza next week, but after this trauma I need guarantees that pineapple never happens again.

Ideally you would no longer offer pineapple and ban it from your premises. If there really is a demand for such abominations, I can see why you would want to offer such a product. People who like pineapple on pizza are dangerous, the more money they spend on pizza the less they have for things like Crocs and weapons of mass destruction. Perhaps you could implement safety measures such as requiring two people with keys to access a pineapple safe and offer special pizza boxes with gigantic warnings that the pizza inside contains pineapple. It would both prevent accidents from happening and it would help the rest of society identify the demented and dangerous people who like pineapple on pizza. Please, think of the children.

Please see the attached picture of the removed pineapple, I warn you that it is graphic and not for the weak stomached. I would normally feed such food to my dog but if he actually ate it I would have to get rid of him. Thankfully compost gets picked up tomorrow and I can start to put this behind me and begin the healing process.

 

[kidwoo]

*vibes*

 

[jdcamb]

I once emailed this to my local pizzeria

As part of my weekly pizza ritual I ordered a large pepperoni and mushroom pizza from your Phinney Ridge location. When I got home I was horrified to find that I had in fact received a pepperoni and pineapple pizza. Due to the complications of returning a pizza during a pandemic I decided to suck it up and quickly removed as much pineapple as I could. I would really like to get a pepperoni and mushroom pizza next week, but after this trauma I need guarantees that pineapple never happens again.

Ideally you would no longer offer pineapple and ban it from your premises. If there really is a demand for such abominations, I can see why you would want to offer such a product. People who like pineapple on pizza are dangerous, the more money they spend on pizza the less they have for things like Crocs and weapons of mass destruction. Perhaps you could implement safety measures such as requiring two people with keys to access a pineapple safe and offer special pizza boxes with gigantic warnings that the pizza inside contains pineapple. It would both prevent accidents from happening and it would help the rest of society identify the demented and dangerous people who like pineapple on pizza. Please, think of the children.

Please see the attached picture of the removed pineapple, I warn you that it is graphic and not for the weak stomached. I would normally feed such food to my dog but if he actually ate it I would have to get rid of him. Thankfully compost gets picked up tomorrow and I can start to put this behind me and begin the healing process.

Permij for you. I fire off things like this all the time. I never thought to share them here. Yours is a masterpiece.

 

[Westy]

Permij for you. I fire off things like this all the time. I never thought to share them here. Yours is a masterpiece.

There are people who appreciate the absurd, and people who are simply absurd.

 

[rideit]

That was remarkably well written. Did you get a reply?

 

[jdcamb]

It was 108F in Athens Greece today.

 

[Jm_]

I hooked up the syringes and went to town sucking and pulling.

 

[Westy]

I want to see @kidwoo naked

 

[Westy]

Went to town sucking and pulling.

 

[StiHacka]

almost zero chance of fluid leakage

 

[Atomic Dog]

Guess we'll continue squatting above my in-laws

 

[rideit]

My guess would be that it wasn't even tight with the head broken off

 

[jackalope]

It was tight in there... Luckily the way it broke left a narrow “lip” protruding outside

 

[Jm_]

Bush is slowly coming back after killing off some Chinese

 

[slimshady]

I want toe boobs

 

[iRider]

Put a plug in there and you're good to go

 

[Toshi]

this fat chungus is actually great. Wrap it across your back and shoulders

 

[Changleen]

I was literally thinking of you and this thread when I wrote ‘fat purple strength lizard’ but I guess this works too.

 

[eric strt6]

hey @StiHacka are you around this weekend? trying to get a woody ride going

 

[DaveW]

I'm a dainty ballerina

 

[StiHacka]

Tonight I play trumpet.

 

[englertracing]

homeslice, I'm just asking if I can get away with dropping a little triflow down the chute

 

[Toshi]

I have a huge one up front, but none in the rear

 

[jonKranked]

You can probably insert yourself

 

[Westy]

So the Electricians came by and measured my load.

 

[StiHacka]

there were a couple of tiny holes to jump