Jebus. It hit me last night. For some reason I remembered this episode. So funny.
Homer Simpson: Mmmm. Hey, this hot dog tastes different.
Apu: Yes, I just cleaned out the machine sir, so the snack you are enjoying has not been soaking in its putrid grease.
Homer Simpson: Yeah ... but without all the grease all you can taste is the hog anus.
from the episode where Homer becomes a trucker (Maximum Homerdrive)
Red Barclay- take it from me. this one's not for greenhorns.
Homer- who's a greenhorn? what's a greenhorn?
Bart- sic 'em dad! sic all of 'em!
then, getting into the truck-
Bart- can i come?
Homer- Don't you have school
Bart- don't you have work?
Homer- ah, touche
my other favorite episode has to be Homer to the Max (where he changes his name to Max Power). Homer changes his name because a TV show has a stupid cop character named Homer Simpson. from the show
Cheif- Simpson, where have you been?
Homer- I was supervising the guns for toys program
Cheif- it's toys for guns!
Homer- Uh oh, spaghetti-o!
can't quite remember why, but in one episode, bart and lisa are running from ralph again. ralph watches them go away, then says, "why do people run from me?" just after finishing, you can see a wet blotch seeping over the front of his pants. that makes me laugh
Homer after falling into tar pit:No, no, I'm pretty sure I can just struggle my way out. First I'll reach in and pull my legs out, (schloop) Now I'll pull my arms out with my face (splup,gurgle)
Grandpa: I had Seeareeeeex
Bart: I didn't do it
Cheif Wiggum: Okay folks, shows over, nothing to see here shows... oh my god a horrible plane crash, hey everybody get a load of this flaming wreckage, come on everybody crowd around, now don't be shy, crowd around.
Grandpa:Come in, come in, I'm losing your transmission!
Irritaded Guy: I said FRENCH FRYS
Grandpa: What? Do we sell freeeench frieees?
Homer: My baloney has a first name, its H-O-M-E-R, my baloney has a second name its H-O-M-E-R
Homer: Oh yeah, this must be that pain thing (Thump) yep, definately pain!
Homer: Woohoo look at that flubber fly!
Mr Burns: Yes, you're in deep D'oh now!
Cheif Wiggum: Ah no, you've got the wrong number, this is 91.....2
Bart: What a load of crappy crap crap!
Bart: It's craptacular
Homer: Hey, there a New Mexico
Cheif Wiggum: Don't snap my undies
Mr Burns: Men, theres a little crippled boy sitting in a hospital who wants you to win this game, I know because I crippled him myself to inspire you
Cheif wiggam: wait thoses arent bombs their hotdogs, armour hotdogs.
Superintenant chalmers: What KIND of man wears armour hotdogs?
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Skinner: I really do love Endna Krabappel
Maude Flanders: Oh this isnt just about love its about s-e-x infront of the c-h-i-l-d-r-e-n..
Krusty: Sex Caldron!! I thought that place got shut down.
I know it was already posted in here somewhere but I just saw the rerun where the kids take over the school and Principal Skinner is tied up in the dodge ball bag.
Skinner- "good work Mr. Nibbles, Now chew through my ball sack"
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